My son has always been a challenge to educate. He's a really good boy and very smart, but it's been hard to find a school that is the right fit for him. We started in our "neighborhood" public school; that is, the default public school. Kindergarten was fine, but First Grade was a nightmare - a classroom with a loose structure (i.e. group working in "centers") that wasn't suited to a kid with auditory and speech issues. About this time we also figured out our son had ADHD.
Next step - a "traditional" public school. A traditional school is a regular public school except the kids wear uniforms and are taught in a more traditional way - desks that face a teacher who centrally presents the lesson from a textbook. In our case, the "traditional" public school used Saxon math and Spaulding reading methods which were very beneficial for our son. A kid who could not memorize 15 simple spelling words without a lot of frustration and tears became a great speller because he understood the phonics of the words. Also, the teaching method was better because it cut out distractions by having only one source of instruction - the teacher.
Fast forward to 5th Grade. In about 4th grade in our traditional public school, students were learning how to keep a "planner" - an organizer so they can track their assignments. By the time 5th Grade rolled around, missing assignments counted as a "0" and students had approximately 5 subjects to track. Executive skills were a must - the ability to prioritize, manage time, synthesize important points and stay organized. Flat out - he lacked executive skills. In a classroom with 30 kids even with his 504 accommodation, there was no way the teacher was able to work on these skills. At the end of 5th Grade, he was failing most classes and convinced he was stupid. Time for a change.
We made the radical decision to go to a charter school, but not just any charter. We turned to an online charter school. It's very close to home schooling, but with a structure of a school (curriculum, grades, lesson plans, etc). My husband did the day-to-day teaching with the assistance of online lessons. It was very successful - Christian had good grades and proved to himself that he could be successful in school. Unfortunately, it was very difficult for my husband who was also trying to work full time, so we just couldn't continue.
This year we are turning to the next school choice option - private school. Christian is attending a very small Catholic school that uses a "classical" teaching method. So far we are very impressed with both the quality of the curriculum and the values and sense of community we definitely did not find in public school. The small class size and the knowledge that he can do the work is motivating him to step up in both his study but also in those organizational skills. After our experience with online school, we also recognize the importance of understanding exactly what he is learning and how to help him.
I'm so thankful we have so many choices for educating our children. Not every kid learns the same way, but the only way to get the right education for a child is to keep pursuing what works for him or her. I sometimes feel like a whiner for complaining about school, but I'm not sorry about advocating for what is best for my son, whether that is public, charter or private school.
Let's see what this year brings.
cindy
Showing posts with label disorganized child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label disorganized child. Show all posts
Monday, September 2, 2013
Sunday, October 7, 2012
The Art of Learning
On Saturdays, it's my job to teach my 11-year old son, because my husband does it all week. I teach Language Arts and Art. Language Arts is fine - I'm pretty comfortable with that - but Art is another issue. I am creative, but not artistic. I can craft, but don't make me draw a picture. There is a lot of picture drawing involved in this class. There are no patterns involved.
As part of this teaching gig, I'n learning about elements of art. Line, color, shape, texture, are part of my vocabulary now, but only to the extent of appreciation. Today we were learning about balance. The easy type of balance is "formal." It's the easiest to understand because it's simple symmetry. We also learned about radial balance, in which items "radiate" from a single point, frequently unseen. The best example I can give is a fan. Finally, the last form of balance we learned about was "informal" or asymmetrical balance. That one was the most interesting, but also the most difficult to understand.
As part of the lesson, Christian and I had to walk around the house looking for examples of each type of balance so he can sketch them. Here's his example of formal balance (symmetry):
What I realized is that there is a natural sense of balance in all kinds of things. I didn't realize that what I find myself doing when I take pictures is trying to achieve a type of balance, especially asymmetrical balance. (Photography is the closest I get to being an artist, and I'm hardly a good photographer.) But, I will say that learning some of these elements of art might make me a better photographer, so at least my scrapbooks (if I ever make them), will be more interesting.
One of the best things about working with my son is that I get to channel my inner teacher. I've taught a bit, mostly informally. I really like it. If I weren't a lawyer, I would like to be a teacher. But doing this one-on-one with my son is a great opportunity to connect with him on a totally new level. It's awesome to see the lightbulb go on when he grasps a new concept. So, with something like art, we're learning together. Cool.
cindy
As part of this teaching gig, I'n learning about elements of art. Line, color, shape, texture, are part of my vocabulary now, but only to the extent of appreciation. Today we were learning about balance. The easy type of balance is "formal." It's the easiest to understand because it's simple symmetry. We also learned about radial balance, in which items "radiate" from a single point, frequently unseen. The best example I can give is a fan. Finally, the last form of balance we learned about was "informal" or asymmetrical balance. That one was the most interesting, but also the most difficult to understand.
As part of the lesson, Christian and I had to walk around the house looking for examples of each type of balance so he can sketch them. Here's his example of formal balance (symmetry):
What I realized is that there is a natural sense of balance in all kinds of things. I didn't realize that what I find myself doing when I take pictures is trying to achieve a type of balance, especially asymmetrical balance. (Photography is the closest I get to being an artist, and I'm hardly a good photographer.) But, I will say that learning some of these elements of art might make me a better photographer, so at least my scrapbooks (if I ever make them), will be more interesting.
One of the best things about working with my son is that I get to channel my inner teacher. I've taught a bit, mostly informally. I really like it. If I weren't a lawyer, I would like to be a teacher. But doing this one-on-one with my son is a great opportunity to connect with him on a totally new level. It's awesome to see the lightbulb go on when he grasps a new concept. So, with something like art, we're learning together. Cool.
cindy
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
On the Go
I know my blog is called "Straddling the Gap," but these days my whole family is straddling lots of huge gaps. The kids are so busy with activities, it's all Kent and I can do to keep up. Mackenzie has religious education, choir, softball, Girl Scouts and martial arts. Christian has religious education, Boy Scouts, bowling, Do-Re-Mi (music group), martial arts and youth group. (And we were worried he wouldn't have enough social interaction with homeschooling!)
Kent and I do a lot of "hand-offs." Because his days are spent teaching our son, he does his work in the evening and on weekends. I come home, we say hello and goodbye, and I see him about an hour before bedtime. It's not the easiest arrangement, but it appears to work best for the kids. It's a little more hectic for Kent and I. Kent recently told me "Welcome to the tween years." I guess so.
The next 10 years are going to be interesting. Our kids will go through the teen years into college and we will approach retirement. I tell myself that our kids will keep us young, but in the meantime I might get a lot more gray hair.
Buckle up.
cindy
Kent and I do a lot of "hand-offs." Because his days are spent teaching our son, he does his work in the evening and on weekends. I come home, we say hello and goodbye, and I see him about an hour before bedtime. It's not the easiest arrangement, but it appears to work best for the kids. It's a little more hectic for Kent and I. Kent recently told me "Welcome to the tween years." I guess so.
The next 10 years are going to be interesting. Our kids will go through the teen years into college and we will approach retirement. I tell myself that our kids will keep us young, but in the meantime I might get a lot more gray hair.
Buckle up.
cindy
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Back to School
You would think when you live in one of the hottest places in the United States that schools wouldn't get started until after Labor Day. Nope. School started yesterday - it was 114 degrees.
Ahhh, well, summer in Phoenix. Here are my lovelies on the first day of school:
Can you tell which one is going to a brick and mortar school and which one is going to an online charter school at home?
A year ago I wrote about my son's ADHD and his difficulties in school due to deficits in executive skills. In January I wrote about how we were trying to address his issues through a 504 plan. Those two posts basically summarized our difficult experience last year and our attempts at the beginning of the school year and the middle of the school year to find a way to deal with the problems. It didn't work. By the end of the year he was failing nearly every subject. Funny thing is, based on his test scores in class, he was a B or C student. He was failing because he couldn't turn in the homework we worked on for hours the night before. He couldn't remember where papers were, or what he was supposed to do on assignments. He had no organization, sense of deadlines, executive skills. I'm sure it sounds like most boys, but for our guy it's making him think he's a failure. If you want to understand more about what a lack of executive skills can do to a child, check out this article from WebMD.
This year we're trying a different approach. He is starting 6th grade and we knew there was no way he would be able to handle different subjects with different teachers with different expectations and teaching styles. By the end of the last school year, we made the difficult choice to take him out of a traditional school, opting instead for an online charter school. It's a lot like home schooling, but with a very structured curriculum. My husband is taking on the big task of being my son's learning coach, sitting with him every day while he goes to school. It's a bold experiment, with the goal of getting his executive skills up to par in time to return to traditional high school. This timeframe is not random - research shows that children with ADHD who have deficits in executive skills (also known as executive function) are usually about 3 years behind their peers in this important aspect of learning. It poses a direct risk and obstacle to learning in a classroom environment. In addition to the curriculum through the online charter school, we will be working on exercises and practice on learning executive skills - how to prioritize, organize, focus on a task, use notes, planners and a calendar to know what is coming and summarize what you have learned.
I hope this isn't going to be a post I have to repeat this time next year. I do hope that by January I will be able to report some progress and a more motivated and positive kid.
cindy
Ahhh, well, summer in Phoenix. Here are my lovelies on the first day of school:
Can you tell which one is going to a brick and mortar school and which one is going to an online charter school at home?
A year ago I wrote about my son's ADHD and his difficulties in school due to deficits in executive skills. In January I wrote about how we were trying to address his issues through a 504 plan. Those two posts basically summarized our difficult experience last year and our attempts at the beginning of the school year and the middle of the school year to find a way to deal with the problems. It didn't work. By the end of the year he was failing nearly every subject. Funny thing is, based on his test scores in class, he was a B or C student. He was failing because he couldn't turn in the homework we worked on for hours the night before. He couldn't remember where papers were, or what he was supposed to do on assignments. He had no organization, sense of deadlines, executive skills. I'm sure it sounds like most boys, but for our guy it's making him think he's a failure. If you want to understand more about what a lack of executive skills can do to a child, check out this article from WebMD.
This year we're trying a different approach. He is starting 6th grade and we knew there was no way he would be able to handle different subjects with different teachers with different expectations and teaching styles. By the end of the last school year, we made the difficult choice to take him out of a traditional school, opting instead for an online charter school. It's a lot like home schooling, but with a very structured curriculum. My husband is taking on the big task of being my son's learning coach, sitting with him every day while he goes to school. It's a bold experiment, with the goal of getting his executive skills up to par in time to return to traditional high school. This timeframe is not random - research shows that children with ADHD who have deficits in executive skills (also known as executive function) are usually about 3 years behind their peers in this important aspect of learning. It poses a direct risk and obstacle to learning in a classroom environment. In addition to the curriculum through the online charter school, we will be working on exercises and practice on learning executive skills - how to prioritize, organize, focus on a task, use notes, planners and a calendar to know what is coming and summarize what you have learned.
I hope this isn't going to be a post I have to repeat this time next year. I do hope that by January I will be able to report some progress and a more motivated and positive kid.
cindy
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
The Disorganized Child
At the beginning of the school year I wrote about my ADHD child that was lacking executive functioning; that is, he can’t organize himself or remember what he needs to do. It has been a real struggle in school, especially as he approaches junior high school age. We went into this school year with an elaborate system how to get him organized and help him get past this lack of executive function. Well, that didn’t work so well. At the end of the first semester, he is struggling academically, not because he can’t grasp the subject matter, but because he doesn’t do or turn in homework. The good news is I have learned to accept the temporary academic shortcomings because I know he is a smart and capable kid.
We recently initiated the 504 process with our school. The 504 plan is a guarantee under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) that a child with a disability receives accommodations to “level the playing field” with children who don’t have that disability. Disability is defined as anything that affects essential life functions, including learning. A 504 is different from an IDEA that addresses children with learning disabilities so they can have equal access to education. It’s a subtle difference, but basically a child with an IDEA needs special education or learning resources, where a child with a 504 needs circumstantial accommodations within the classroom.
The school has been very helpful in working with us to choose accommodations, but we did have to be firm, advocating for the help we need. It has been especially helpful to have the school psychologist assist us. She understands that the problem isn’t that my son is lazy, but rather that he can’t follow a series of directions. We are trying very hard to keep it simple – a translucent folder for “turn in” work and a manila folder that stays in the backpack for “bring home” items. The teacher and parents are responsible for getting things in and out of the folder. In addition, the school has agreed to publish homework assignments on the web and accept assignments that are late for full credit. The hope is to enhance my son’s self confidence and generally improve his academic reports.
It’s still very scary, especially as we approach the grade level when he will have multiple teachers. However, it is vital for us to have a 504 plan so there is no confusion about what the accommodations will be. Whether it is ultimately as successful as we hope it will be, remains to be seen. We intend to keep trying. I would highly recommend that anyone in a similar situation seek out a 504 plan with the school. This website has some great FAQ and more information about a 504 plan.
cindy
cindy
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Homework
So school has been in session for several weeks now and it's starting to get difficult for my dear son. Maybe that's not quite right - it's starting to get hard for ME. We have been trying to work on our routines and coping strategies and it has worked somewhat. However, he is still having problems getting the homework turned in and assignments written down in his planner. With activities getting into full swing, it's getting frustrating for both of us. (When activities get going, that means Kentster is not home in the evenings because he has rehearsals and meetings.)
To add to the frustration, dear daughter wants more attention while she does homework. She doesn't have the attention problems dear son has, but she does resent the amount of time her brother gets every night. (You really have to sit on him so he stays on task with the homework and his sister is a serious distraction if she is in the same room.)
I'm trying to regroup on the strategy while I write this. We have eliminated television during the week already, but I think Kentster and I need to eliminate computer time until all homework is completed. We also need to keep the bedtime routine on schedule, beginning at 8:00 p.m. It's all written out on laminated papers stuck to the bathroom mirror - each of them has a schedule that goes in the opposite direction:
Shower (wash & brush hair)
Brush teeth
Lay out clothes for tomorrow
Get backpack together (binders, homework organized)
Put shoes and backpack by the door
It's much easier than nagging because all you have to say is: "Look at your list."
I think something else we should try is to specifically schedule homework time for timeframes between school and bedtime. What I mean is everyday has a different schedule of activities - performing arts, choir, instrument lessons, Girl Scouts, etc. If we have set times on each day, it might make it easier for me when I'm sitting here at 8:29 and dear son hasn't started his bedtime routine that was supposed to begin at 8:00 p.m. We can also give him a sense of time so he has a better concept of how long it takes him to do his homework (and everything else).
Breathe deep and count to 10 . . .
cindy
To add to the frustration, dear daughter wants more attention while she does homework. She doesn't have the attention problems dear son has, but she does resent the amount of time her brother gets every night. (You really have to sit on him so he stays on task with the homework and his sister is a serious distraction if she is in the same room.)
I'm trying to regroup on the strategy while I write this. We have eliminated television during the week already, but I think Kentster and I need to eliminate computer time until all homework is completed. We also need to keep the bedtime routine on schedule, beginning at 8:00 p.m. It's all written out on laminated papers stuck to the bathroom mirror - each of them has a schedule that goes in the opposite direction:
Shower (wash & brush hair)
Brush teeth
Lay out clothes for tomorrow
Get backpack together (binders, homework organized)
Put shoes and backpack by the door
It's much easier than nagging because all you have to say is: "Look at your list."
I think something else we should try is to specifically schedule homework time for timeframes between school and bedtime. What I mean is everyday has a different schedule of activities - performing arts, choir, instrument lessons, Girl Scouts, etc. If we have set times on each day, it might make it easier for me when I'm sitting here at 8:29 and dear son hasn't started his bedtime routine that was supposed to begin at 8:00 p.m. We can also give him a sense of time so he has a better concept of how long it takes him to do his homework (and everything else).
Breathe deep and count to 10 . . .
cindy
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
School for the Disorganized Child
Most people make resolutions in early January. In our house we make resolutions in August and September. Our son CJ will begin 5th grade in less than 2 weeks and he's not the only one dreading it. CJ has ADHD and struggles with focus even with medication. He seems to float through the day, more comfortable in virtual reality worlds of games and TV than in real life. It's challenging for parents who are highly motivated overachievers.
At the end of the last school year, I found myself in tears in front of Kentster, CJ's teacher, the school speech pathologist and school psychologist. While the teacher shared our serious concerns about CJ's inability to keep up, the psychologist was more interested in telling us what they couldn't do for him. I begged for guidance, a clue, SOMETHING that would help us unlock what CJ needed to succeed.
So here we are again. It's almost August and we have resolutions to find a way to help our son. Over the summer we unlocked some answers in great books about executive functioning: "Organizing the Disorganized Child" by Dr. Martin Kutscher and Marcella Moran, and "Smart but Scattered: The Revolutionary 'Executive Skills' Approach to Helping Kids Reach Their Potential," by Peg Dawson and Richard Guare. As I've read these books I've been wondering how these people snuck into my house because they are definitely describing my kid. The basic premise is that some kids (especially ADHD kids) lack the "executive skills" (not CEO skills, but more like the basic organizational skills to get from point A to point B) to organize their desks, much less their cluttered minds. As a result, we now have some new resolutions which are developing into strategies to get this school year off to the right start.
I'm convinced that resolutions are a sign of faith and hope that all things are possible with God's guidance. However, I'm a little skeptical about our ability to perservere when the school year (and church year and legal year) gets more hectic. Check back with us after the first quarter is over and let's see how we're all doing with our "executive skills" :)
cindy
At the end of the last school year, I found myself in tears in front of Kentster, CJ's teacher, the school speech pathologist and school psychologist. While the teacher shared our serious concerns about CJ's inability to keep up, the psychologist was more interested in telling us what they couldn't do for him. I begged for guidance, a clue, SOMETHING that would help us unlock what CJ needed to succeed.
So here we are again. It's almost August and we have resolutions to find a way to help our son. Over the summer we unlocked some answers in great books about executive functioning: "Organizing the Disorganized Child" by Dr. Martin Kutscher and Marcella Moran, and "Smart but Scattered: The Revolutionary 'Executive Skills' Approach to Helping Kids Reach Their Potential," by Peg Dawson and Richard Guare. As I've read these books I've been wondering how these people snuck into my house because they are definitely describing my kid. The basic premise is that some kids (especially ADHD kids) lack the "executive skills" (not CEO skills, but more like the basic organizational skills to get from point A to point B) to organize their desks, much less their cluttered minds. As a result, we now have some new resolutions which are developing into strategies to get this school year off to the right start.
I'm convinced that resolutions are a sign of faith and hope that all things are possible with God's guidance. However, I'm a little skeptical about our ability to perservere when the school year (and church year and legal year) gets more hectic. Check back with us after the first quarter is over and let's see how we're all doing with our "executive skills" :)
cindy
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