Contemplate - The Quality of Life

A while back I heard a radio interview with Roger Ebert.  I remember Roger Ebert as the other half of the famous movie critics Siskel & Ebert.  Gene Siskel died about 8 years ago, but Roger was still working as a film critic with the Chicago Sun Times and on TV after Gene's death.  In 2006, he was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, which subsequently became cancer of the salivary glands and then cancer of the jaw.  He had many treatments and surgeries to rebuild his face which was ravaged by cancer.  The entire bottom of his face is gone and he can't speak because of a tracheotomy.  He uses a computer to speak for him.  He continues to suffer through other health problems, including a fractured hip in December.

As I listened to the radio interview, I thought it was so sad that his life was basically over because so much had been taken from him.  I caught myself and realized - hey, the guy isn't dead yet.  He still writes a regular movie column and well known blog.  His 2011 memoir, Life Itself, is being developed into a movie.

While I was looking for pictures of iron lungs for my post about vaccines, I found this story about a 71 year old woman who lived her entire adult life in an iron lung, dying in her sleep in 2009.

She was cheerful and satisfied even though she spent most of her life in an 800 pound tank.  Initially, I found myself thinking her life was so tragic and wasted.  Not so.  Even though she was stricken with polio at age 11 (in 1948), she graduated from high school, received her associate's degree and a bachelor's degree from Wake Forest College (now University).  In each instance she graduated first in her class.  She was a friend to everyone in her small town, young and old, many of whom came to her home to share high school graduations, wedding celebrations and dinner parties.  She appeared in two documentaries and wrote a memoir in 2003, Breath (Life in the Rhythm of an Iron Lung).  

I've had some time to think about my reactions to both of these stories.  How dare I judge the quality of anyone's life?  I just assume that someone who suffers or is disabled can't be happy living through that.  My faith immediately tells me that is wrong, but I'm still struggling with it.

Tonight I read a reflection on Jesus' words to his disciples:  "As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you."  How much better can life get than to have your Savior and friend look you in the eye and tell you He loves you as much as God loves Him?  Yet each of these disciples Jesus spoke to would go on to suffer fear, deprivation, doubt and horrendous painful deaths.  God's love doesn't guarantee a "happy" life, at least not by the standards I've been using.

Upon further reflection, I think I'm beginning to understand that suffering can be a gift.  It provides a person the opportunity to witness to God's goodness and mercy in the midst of pain.  Jesus tells us not to be afraid, but to rejoice in the times of trial.  It's not so easy to live life for God's glory when you're living it for your own comfort and enjoyment.  A person who is suffering can give a powerful testimony to God's love and mercy, and show the rest of us that the value of life isn't measured by what we consider health and wealth.  Just look to one of the best examples of this testimony:

A "quality life" is not a life of good health, wealth and worldly happiness.  It comes from the knowledge that life, no matter what the circumstances, is a precious gift from God that is meant to be lived for His glory.



cindy

Contemplate - The More Excellent Way

If I speak in human and angelic tongues but do not have love,

I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal.

And if I have the gift of prophecy and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge;

If I have all faith so as to move mountains but do not have love, 

I am nothing.

If I give away everything I own,

If I hand my body over so that I may boast but do not have love, 

I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind.  

It is not jealous, is not pompous, 

It is not inflated, it is not rude, 

It does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, 

It does not brood over injury,

It does not rejoice over wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

It bears all things, 

Believes all things, 

Hopes all things, 

Endures all things.

Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13

You've heard it before - probably at a wedding, right?  Funny thing, St. Paul never mentioned marriage in this letter to the Corinthians. 

Maybe he was talking about God who is Love.

Maybe he was illustrating what it means to love our neighbor as ourselves.

cindy

Contemplate - Honoring The Fallen

A couple of weeks ago, the City of Phoenix held it's annual memorial to employees killed in the line of duty. Fortunately, no employee died this year.


           

In the United States last year, 126 law enforcement personnel and 82 firefighters (39 of those volunteers) died in the line of duty. Each one knew that the possibility of death was part of the job description and each made the conscious choice to pursue their calling. They don't do it for the money - they do it because they love serving the public.  That's you and me.


           

Take a minute or two today to remember these hometown heroes and say"thank you" the next time you meet one.



cindy

Contemplate - A Woman of Value

What makes a woman meaningful and valuable in our culture?  A poem might go like this:

A good woman, where can she be found?

   She's worth her weight in gold.

Her husband thinks she is a good lover,

   and does a good job with the kids.

She has the most fashionable clothes

   and always a fresh mani-pedi.

She's active in the PTO

   and supports the admirable work of Planned Parenthood.

She makes sure her kids understand what is politically correct,

   and tries to be their best friend.

She takes care of the checkbook

   and makes the minimum payments on the credit cards.

She's busy with book club, driving the kids to activities

   and gets take-out on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

She balances her career with home life

   and occasionally has time to help with homework.

Her children are happy if she's there when they get up for school

   and her husband is happy when the house is picked up.

A woman who moisturizes her skin, gets to the health club

   and looks 10 years younger than her age is valued.

She's all things to all people.

Is that the standard we are striving for?  Perhaps we should instead look to God's standard for women:

A wife of noble character who can find?

   She is worth far more than rubies.

Her husband has full confidence in her

   and lacks nothing of value.

She brings him good, not harm,

   all the days of her life.

She is clothed with strength and dignity;

   she can laugh at the days to come.

She speaks with wisdom,

   and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

She watches over the affairs of her household

   and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Her children arise and call her blessed;

   her husband also, and he praises her:

“Many women do noble things,

   but you surpass them all.”

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Honor her for all that her hands have done,

   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Proverbs 31: 10-12; 25-31

When this life is over, I pray I might be judged mercifully by God's standards.

cindy

Contemplate - Chats with God

Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear; all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

I can get really stressed out sometimes trying to find a "solution" to life's problems.  The "problems" I'm speaking about are just my own (being effective at work, getting the kids to eat right or brush their teeth, house repairs, etc).  I can't imagine what it would be like to worry about the bigger picture (world peace, climate change, terrorism, the economy).  As a lawyer, I tend to think that I can find solutions to life's problems if I try hard enough.  That, in turn, just makes me stress even more.

The other day I was listening to Selah on my IPod and heard "What a Friend We Have in Jesus," and the words quoted above.  It really struck a chord with me.  How much time do I spend laying my problems down and taking them to my friend Jesus?  Now He may not "solve" my problems the way I think He should - my kids won't suddenly start brushing their teeth - but I have found that just having the conversation and giving up my worries to Him has an immediate impact in reducing my stress.  It also reminds me that I am not (and don't have to be) in control of every aspect of my life.  I just wish I had the conversations with God more frequently. 

To quote an overused 70's phrase: "Let go and let God."

cindy

Contemplate - Living in the Now

Tonight I was going through the photos on our Mac and managed to do a quick trip down memory lane with pictures of my kids.  Mackenzie is now 9 (10 in a couple of weeks) and Christian is 11 (almost 12) {sigh}.  While I looked at pictures from infancy to elementary school, I remembered the times when each one was taken and what I was thinking then.

By the time Mackenzie was 2 and Christian was 4, I remember thinking that they were such big kids and I missed their "babyness".  Now I look at pictures of them at those ages and wish I could reach back in time and smack myself.  Didn't I see how adorable they were?  I also think how "busy" I was (or at least I thought I was) when I was a SAHM.  Some of the cutest pictures were taken while I was trying to take pictures of items to sell on Ebay.  I had to stop and take pictures of them because they wanted to spend time with me.

Today I look at them and still catch myself thinking how their "childhood" is almost gone.  How ridiculous is that??  They still have plenty of "kid time" and I need to enjoy it NOW.  Sure, they were cute back then, but they are still cute now.  Mackenzie asks if we will pay for college, but she doesn't want to go more than a couple of miles away :)  Christian is still creeping into our room at night every once and again.  They are still so innocent and I'm trying to stay in the present to savor every minute.  I wish I had a device to record all the funny things they say.

You know, when you try to drive while constantly looking in the rear view mirror, you are bound to crash into something in front of you - the future.

cindy